Sunday, June 30, 2013

Spittin a thought . . .

So I applied for a special detail with my job . . . I got it.  I am shocked I got it.  It’s a pretty important position . . . I will have lives as my responsibility.  What really amazes me is that the group of people I work for feel I am able to handle all of this.  WTF?  As I think about it, I feel I can do this.  It will struggle in the beginning but I don’t have any self doubt in myself.  Normally I am beating myself up with self doubt . . . I mean with a BIG baseball bat.  Not now.  Am I growing up? Do I not know the full impact of this position? What is going on?  My way of thinking is changing.  I think I’m embracing it too.  Where is this going?  I think I am growing.  Damnit!  I like being the mature teenager I have not evolved from yet . . . I guess this is good.  It’s that Law of Attraction that I have been living in for the last 6 years.  Now it’s out of control! 

I work in uniform.  About two months ago I was so hell bent on being out of uniform and not testing for my job as I annually do each year.  Well the position I am in I am no longer in uniform, while doing the position and I am using my head for a change.  I get to think and make decisions.  Now I have to get into the same position and not test.  Great goal I think.  I’ve thought about this for so long that the thought became organic and part of me ~ amongst other things.

Just spittin a thought . . . 

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